Recent Random Rambles #8

Me: Clean up your barbies.
Avery: You can do it to serve me. I've waited my whole life for someone to serve me!
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Daddy, when I grow up I wanna be a hula hooper.
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I want all the bugs in this room killed except the one sleeping on the bottom bunk! (AKA June Bug)
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No one is allowed up there (on the top bunk) unless they're my age or me.
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Me: You're 45 months old!
Avery: How 'bout when people ask me how old I am I just pretend I'm 45?
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When I'm four will I still be young? Will I go places by myself, like to the Rose's house?
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I'm gonna go get my phone and put that (a song she just made up) on Facebook.
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I have a problem in here. Which should come out first, the pee or the poo? Cause the pee is stuck to the poo and they won't come out!
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Me explaining who bought the Rowan's house: Their names are Derek and Andrea. They're young and they don't have any kids yet.
Avery: Let's go over there and I'll be their kid.
Me: What about me? You're my kid.
Avery: Well, it's too boring, you ptm.com!
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Me and Avery discussing a strange purple spot in June's ear:
Me: It might just be a mole.
Avery: Or it might be a wedgie.
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Pee spout. Poo spout.
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Mom, zip June's lip!